The Gift of Being Understood
By Dr. Kristin Mauldin, Ph.D.
This past week I held the last class of my Sports Psychology course. The students expressed sadness over it ending, took the time to share contact info with each other, and then gave each other (and me!) hugs as they left. Several of them made comments about how amazing the class was, a comment that absolutely makes my day (week? year?), but I also only take a small bit of the credit for. See, what I know, is that they were the ones that made that course amazing.
Let me give a little background here. Sports psychology IS a course that lends itself to fun and introspection. We talk about things such as group cohesion, imagery, and communication, all topics that are very relatable and focus on increasing confidence and coping skills. Then we get to enjoy some experiential learning through various activities such as obstacle courses and untangling human knots. These activities are fun, but what is really neat about them is how they break down the barriers between the students. On the first day of class, like in most classes, the students are fairly quiet and reserved, sort of feeling things out. Not too many weeks in, after various activities and discussions, the room is filled with discussion and banter. I LOVE watching this transformation! We go from a class of several individuals to a cohesive group. A team. Friends. And, yes, I’m including myself in that.
So how am I giving credit to the students for this cohesive ending? The students are willing to be vulnerable. They each, in their own time, and their own way, make the decision to come forward and take a risk. And this is what that looks like. That risk is my shy, introverted student stepping in to a rather raucous class activity, and speaking up. That risk is my students sharing the struggles they are currently experiencing, or have experienced, because they see how it ties to the topic that day. That risk is my students pairing up in unlikely partnerships and putting in effort to connect with each other. That risk is my students bravely participating in activities that ask them to reveal fears and insecurities in front of each other. What comes out of all of this risk taking is the students begin to understand each other, and they feel more understood. When that quieter student talked, the rest listened and responded. When that struggling student shared, the other students showed empathy and care. When emotions rose, hugs were given. With all of these difficult and scary moments, came an equal amount of support, bonding, and laughter.
Just a few weeks ago the Sport and Performance Psychology (SPP) program participated in the 2019 Bullying Prevention Conference. This is a part of our ongoing partnership with Riverside Medical Clinic Charitable Foundation to prevent bullying in Riverside high schools by pairing SPP graduate students with high school students. Through these pairings, our graduate students teach the high school students to put on presentations and events at their high schools with the hope that they will teach these skills to their peers. While the link between sport and performance psychology and bullying prevention may not be obvious to all, the overlap is actually quite strong. Techniques used to increase performance are effective because they lead to more positive framing, imaging, self-talk, communication, self-awareness, stress management, coping strategies, and self-confidence. All of these skills can be used to help adolescents deal with the stressors that come with high school.
A major component of sport and performance psychology, and of bullying prevention efforts, is increasing social cohesion. In his presentation, Bullying & The Bully: How Can We Address This Behavior?, Joseph Antonelli discussed how bullies ostracize their victims in order to increase their own social capitol. By focusing on differences between their social group and the victim, the bully increases the cohesion within their group, as well as their own group status. Thus, focusing on differences and splintering social groups can advance bullying activities, whereas creating a culture of empathy and inclusivity can undermine bullying activities, making it ‘cool’ to bring in group members rather than ostracize them.
And, of course, creating a culture of empathy requires the participation of students willing to be vulnerable. Willing to take a step forward to try to connect with their peers, include them, and understand them. It requires the type of behavior that I saw from my Sports Psychology students this past semester, leading us to have an amazing semester together.
What do you think? Share your thoughts below. CBU student comments left within a week of initial publication will be entered into a raffle for a free CSHB external battery to power your technology on the go. Winners notified via email.
Dr. Kristin Mauldin
Director, Sport and Performance Psychology, California Baptist University
Dr. Mauldin graduated with her Ph.D. in psychology from Miami University and conducted research as a postdoctoral fellow at University of California, San Diego. She specializes in the cognitive neuroscience of learning and memory and sport, performance, and exercise psychology. She enjoys her role as a professor of psychology because it gives her the opportunity to study topics she loves while connecting with her students. Now, as the Director of the Sport and Performance Psychology program at California Baptist University, she has had the opportunity to build a graduate program that serves its students and the community. Dr. Mauldin’s own experience growing up with a physically debilitating disease has helped fuel her efforts to design programs that helps others increase their own physical and mental health through the use of techniques grounded in psychology.
13 Comments
I found it very interesting on how creating a culture of empathy will produce people to understand and connect with each other, while noticing these subtle differences in behavior by Dr. Maudlin. The post seems to steam my mind to think of abstract ideas about behavior and society as a whole, such as the micro facial expressions ideals. This blog post gives me lots of aspiration and courage to strive to be a professor like Dr. Mauldin in the future someone who will be able to look at everything as a learning experience.
Lawrence, I am glad you found the blog compelling and inspirational. I wish you the best of luck, and may God continue to guide you on your journey to becoming a professor.
I love this! It’s so encouraging to read and such a great reminder of that deeper connection that we all strive for and need. This makes me want to take a Sports Psychology class!
Claire, I am delighted that you found this post to be inspirational.
This blog posting is truly inspiring. As a student at CBU it is such a privilege to have professors who actually care about students, not just how they do in the classroom and on tests but outside of school and what is in their hearts. It seems silly that we as students are typically the ones (especially at this school) who are more closed off that our professors. Seeing more and more of our professors desire to learn about us and help us on our education journey fuels my passion to in turn learn more about them and create even a larger community that way!
This post makes me wish I was able to take this class! I found it very fascinating that being vulnerable is the key to creating an empathetic and inclusive culture. You do amazing work with anti-bullying campaigns and your knowledge is put to good use in a culture that desperately needs it. I loved reading about the progression of your class and how much of an impact it has on their lives from then on out.
I loved reading this post because I really related to the shy students in class. I know what the difference feels like in presenting or sharing amongst students whom I do not know well versus peers whom I am close to and feel understood by. It really makes a difference in my academic experience and performance. I am glad Dr. Mauldin has brought attention to this topic.
Dr. Kristin Mauldin,
This experience was very interesting to read from your perspective. I got a small glance of the sports psychology program and what you guys do when a group came into my cheer practice about every other week or so to share some tips and advice on how to build the minds and confidence of my team. Understanding the people you work closely with on a deeper level beyond the surface is crucial to having an enhanced experience and better working environment in general. I feel that sometimes we let whatever issues we have going on in our own lives distract us from our surroundings to the point where we may not even realize that our peers are dealing with something similar or worse than us. And sometimes being there and helping someone else out can help alleviate our own pain and suffering. Taking the time out to get to know and better understand the people in the group you work with at least twice a month is definitely important and will continue to make a difference.
This post was a joy to read. I love how it unexpectedly tied in the problem of bullying. I think there needs to be more awareness about how cohesiveness among peers can prevent bullying. The Sports Psychology Class was a great example of seeing this theory in action.
Dr. Mauldin,
Being vulnerable is a hard thing to do, it is so great that you and your students were able to create an environment where they express their inner selves without judgment. As a CBU student majoring in Psychology, I can attest to the welcoming and safe environment created in these classrooms. Not only does this environment create feelings of being understood, it enhances the student’s abilities to learn and grow as individuals.
I love your post Dr. Mauldin! I wish that I could have taken one of your classes at CBU because I love this type of teaching style and I love building a family within my classes. I am a very vulnerable person and I wear my heart on my sleeve and I love sharing my life with professors or other peers because I also believe that it creates a deeper connection and it gives us room to grow as people and it helps us grow to understand people. Sitting in a silent class that doesn’t talk that much is really boring to me, so I try to create relationships in each class as much as I can. I believe that on the first day of your class no matter what semester you are in, you should introduce yourself to all of your professors because you will benefit from doing that more than not doing it. Being vulnerable is scary sometimes with people you don’t know, but it is worth it.
Knowing how to give instruction and show structure as a professor is extremely important, but even more importantly it is to create an everlasting bond that students can continue to cherish even after they graduate. That is what they’ll remember the most. That beautiful bond with theyre professor… sometimes that teaches so much more than what a textbook can offer. Beautiful read, Dr. Mauldin!
This is article was an interesting read, there is a barrier between professors and teachers but being able to do activities while also learning helps the students feel welcomed. Having students being able to talk to each other will help them connect and understand each other. Reading about how the class is and how you can get students to understand each other and just the activities to help with bullying makes me want to look into sport psychology.