As a future teacher,\u00a0many of my courses require me to do observation or tutoring hours.\u00a0I am required\u00a0to do a mixture of both for\u00a0a\u00a0total of about\u00a015\u00a0hours\u00a0this semester.\u00a0I have been working with sixth graders\u00a0the past few weeks, tutoring them in math and language arts.<\/p>\n
When I was told I would be working with\u00a0this group,\u00a0I thought I would have a difficult time. I honestly thought that these students would not want to work with a tutor and would be difficult to get them to cooperate. However, I have been blessed with students who are excited to work with me.\u00a0(Although, I think they are just excited to be able to work with a college student.)<\/p>\n
This past week we were working on how to cite sources when my heart just broke for these children. While we were working,\u00a0the students began to ask questions and engage in more off-topic conversations than\u00a0normal. A few of them had already made comments like, \u201cShe knows a lot since she\u2019s in college,\u201d or \u201cShe probably does this all the time since she is in college.\u201d I tried to engage them\u00a0by\u00a0telling them learning how to cite now is important because they will have to do it all the time when they go to college. One girl told me her brother had already been accepted to colleges,\u00a0but she did not want him to leave home.<\/p>\n
The students were doing quite well at getting off-topic during this tutoring session. However, it was this next portion of conversation that was absolutely heartbreaking. The students then began asking me what college was like, how many roommates I had, if boys were allowed in ourrooms\/apartments, and if boys were allowed to live with us. I told them a little about my three roommates and that boys could not live with girls,\u00a0but they were allowed to visit at certain times, all while trying to get them focused back on citing sources.<\/p>\n
Then came the question, \u201cDo you go to a lot of parties, you know like the ones that they have on TV and in movies?\u201dOf course,\u00a0I said\u00a0\u201cNo, I don\u2019t go to parties like that.\u201d They asked\u00a0if I ever have parties at my apartment. I explained\u00a0to them that I can have parties at my apartment,\u00a0but they are not like the ones you see on TV.<\/p>\n
Throughout this entire conversation thoughts were flowing through my head:\u00a0\u201cwhy\u00a0are your parents allowing an 11-year-old to watch these shows?\u201d Then the reality hit me. This is the world that we live in. This is the world that I will be teaching in.\u00a0However, another reality hit me, a reality that is a little bit more difficult to cope with. As a teacher,\u00a0I can never share my beliefs with my students. In the situation that I just recently encountered,\u00a0the most I can do is tell them that I do not party\u00a0like\u00a0in the movies,because it\u2019s a bad thing to do.\u00a0How lame does that sound?The question I constantly ask myself is\u00a0\u2018how can I be a light in a place that is so dark?\u2019<\/p>\n
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